Done is better than perfect.

I have a folder on my phone with videos I took for Instagram during my solo cross-country road trip that I never shared. Eight to ten hours of driving a day is more than enough neutral time for ideas and inspiration to come through. I had tips on how to avoid an aching body on long drives, a how-to guide for finding ideal camping spots before dark, realizations about the nature of reality; you name it. All are hoarded on my phone for no one to see.

I have iPhone notes, journal pages, voice memos, trello boards, novlr tabs, and texts to myself with ideas and thoughts that I, at one point, wanted to share with you. Touching stories from Oakland, observational lessons from French children in Provence, thoughts on dating in different countries, takeaways from officiating a best friend’s wedding… my mind is always working, and ideas are always flowing. The bottleneck has been the sharing.

What happens when I go to share these things with you? Well, for starters, I think… Where should I share this thing? Instagram? Substack? Email? Substack then email? Substack then Instagram? A girl could make herself crazy… and trust me, I have. If I make it past that conundrum, then begins the tried and true cascade of deafening self-doubt. If I say this, then someone might interpret it as that. I’m scared I’m going to offend someone. I can’t possibly gather my words well enough to articulate this very complex point I’m trying to make. Maybe I don’t even have a point!

In Mrs. McCormick’s third-grade class, dressed in a puffy pink tutu on stage in my first live play performance, I proudly recited, “The point?! What IS the point?!”

This memory resurfaced recently when someone asked me about the first time I remember feeling proud of myself. I recalled saying that comedic line out loud on stage after weeks of practicing at home in front of my parents—and being met with loud, unanimous laughter from what felt like an auditorium-sized crowd. That auditorium was really our small third-grade classroom, that crowd made up of my classmate’s parents, and that loud laughter- probably just chuckles… but my feeling of pride was real.

I was asked about this memory to help identify my “success pattern.” When it was lined up next to many more recent feelings of success, I could see that all of these experiences had two things in common: eyes on me and the pressure to perform.

This is helpful because rather than seeing a more recent financial pressure as stressful, I can identify that this is actually when I work best. And as for the eyes on me… well, here we are.

Which brings me back to my point! Aha! Maybe I do have a point. I’m done hoarding my ideas in an ever-growing mound of digital clutter. I know that at least part of my calling is to learn by trial and error- to take risks, go on adventures, and report back so that other people can learn from my mistakes (and successes.) I’m here to do life differently and to show you that you can, too.

You don’t have to be terrified of uncertainty.

You don’t have to have Sunday scaries every week on repeat.

You don’t have to feel alone all the time.

You don’t have to criticize your body.

You don’t have to be mean to yourself!

You don’t have to do the motions without enjoying your life.

You don’t have to live somewhere you don’t want to live.

You don’t have to watch the world burn and feel your hope burn alongside it.

You don’t have to give up on something better.

You don’t have to settle.

Am I done learning all this? NO.

Am I still proving all these things to myself as I go? More than you know.

But I don’t want to wait until my life looks like a finished project with a shiny bow to share with the world. I want to show you what it’s like along the way. What it looks like to have faith in yourself and the world even when you’re doubting everything. I believe in myself so hard that I’m willing to let you watch me fail and succeed.

For example, I’m going to tell you that for the first year of coaching, clients seem to arrive out of thin air with very little or no effort on my part to attract them. And then those clients referred more clients and I thought.. ‘ok cool! I won’t have to work very hard to get people to work with me, and I can focus on what I really love- the inner work I’m guiding people through.’ My luxuriating-veering-on-lazy Taurus self was overjoyed. I actually thought I was going to somehow sneak under the radar and bypass the hard work that comes with both spiritual growth and entrepreneurial success. Things were good. But then they stayed there… I plateaued my growth. Clients stopped magically appearing, and the universe said, “Oh no, honey, you have more to learn here. If you want people to know about this powerful work, you have to tell them about it. It’s time for you to use your voice.” In perfect timing, I was introduced to the Stockdale Paradox, which says that: ‘In order to succeed, you have to have total faith that it’s going to work out while also having no delusions about where you are now and how much work it’s going to take to get there.’

I’ve learned over and over again in my inner work that my capacity to grow is directly related to my capacity to be uncomfortable. So, the answer is obvious. If I want to keep growing, I need to start doing the shit I am avoiding.

So here I am.

I’m done hoarding. I’m widening the bottleneck. I’m ready to do the work. To sit my ass down and write. To share with you. And sometimes, there might not even be a point! And you’ll find grammatical errors and typos, and when you do, I want you to know that I’m PROUD of those errors because they mean that I’m doing the damn thing. That done is better than perfect and that I’m done letting perfectionism paralyze me into inaction.

As I write this now, I feel a spark reigniting in me. I can’t see the full picture yet, but I’m done ignoring my intuition. I know I’m supposed to write, so thank you for being on the other end.